She was calmness itself, at peace with where she was, with what they were doing. It was as though she had surrendered to the will of God already, as though he moved her, directed her, and she was but his instrument. Saba didn’t even seem phased-by anything. Snow lay in icy, dirty clumps at the edges of the pavement, melting in the gutters to murky puddles. Have you been here before? she asked quietly, her breath coming in white clouds in the cold air. In the window, she caught the reflection of Saba’s easy smile, as if she frequented sex toy stores all the time. She shuffled her feet and coughed but didn’t move towards the door. Still, Nadia was hyperaware of the products on display. The sun reflected off the windows, obscuring the view of the shop inside. To our friends who worked at the Manchester Arena in the aftermath of such horror, there are no words that can ease the pain of what you saw, what you dealt with, and what you worked through for the sake of others. I know I’m a pain in the arse when I’m writing…well, most of the time to be fair…but I couldn’t do it without you. Louise, for believing in me and almost convincing me this was worth writing when I was convinced it was a steaming pile of horse shit, thank you. Thank you for making my vague idea a reality.

I know you found this one to be especially difficult. AcknowledgementsĪstrid, Daniela, Michelle, and all the rest of the fabulous team at Ylva, thank you for trusting in me and this series. Including all the times you keep us safe and we don’t even know it. To the emergency services and police involved in each attack-we thank you for all you do.

Eight dead, forty-eight injured.ġ9 June – Finsbury Park Mosque. Twenty-two dead, 250 injured.ģ June – London Bridge and Borough Market. Six dead, forty-nine injured.Ģ2 May – Manchester Arena. To the victims of the 2017 terror attacks in Great Britain.Ģ2 March – Westminster.

The Last First Time by Andrea Bramhall